Being the best partner'

What’s the Truth About Lying in a Marriage

What’s the Truth About Lying in a Marriage

The dictionary definition of lying is “To speak falsely or utter untruth knowingly as with intent to deceive, to express what is false or convey a false impression.” It is an option available to all individuals [...]

The Quest for a Mate’s Approval

The Quest for a Mate’s Approval

One of the great benefits of a committed relationship is the security of being loved, accepted and cherished by our mate. The knowledge that our bond is safe, secure and love-based keeps us contented and emotionally [...]

The Suffering of Compassionate People

The Suffering of Compassionate People

Our culture holds compassionate people in high regard. The kind teacher who helps a struggling student, the Emergency Medical Responders who rescue accident and trauma victims, Police men and women who routinely encounter human cruelty, trauma [...]

How to Develop Greater Empathy for Your Mate

How to Develop Greater Empathy for Your Mate

This column’s topic was spurred by a reader’s question about how to develop empathy after having been told by several dates that his non-empathic responses rendered him an unsuitable mate. It is likely that a less [...]

Neutralizing Arguments in Relationships

Neutralizing Arguments in Relationships

It is not uncommon for many couples to find themselves in adversarial positions in discussing issues of concern to one or both of them. The desire for need fulfillment, personal validation and reaffirmation of our mate’s [...]

It is common for people who are dissatisfied with their relationship to ascribe their discomfort to their partner’s faults, failures, personality demerits or displeasing conduct. Though these factors may certainly contribute to relationship disharmony, could the [...]

Lifelong Attention Secures Happy Unions

Lifelong Attention Secures Happy Unions

All living organisms require attention to survive and thrive. Infants, children, adults, animals and even plants wither and wilt without sufficient care and attention. Attention is needed not only for our physical survival but also for [...]

Validating Others is a Win-Win Practice

Validating Others is a Win-Win Practice

One of the most common complaints expressed by mates during couple therapy is that one or both do not feel valued, respected, appreciated or positively regarded by the other. Why would these attributes command such a [...]